For those who care for someone with Parkinson's disease
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By hubb On 2011.01.11 11:44
I lost my PD spouse of 52 years on Monday. PD claimed another victim. He had been in hospital for a week and the combination of PD, age and pneumonia took its toll. He had rallied Sunday and was to be discharged to go to a rehab center on Monday and everything fell apart Sunday night. He had been diagnosed for 25 years, and only the last 3 years or so weren't so good and the last year has been pretty "iffy". It really hurt to see a vital, vibrant man go to a stooped, shuffling, shaking person - a man who could fly the Navy's biggest jets aboard a pitching deck of a carrier in the dark of night and then couldn't figure out how to sit down in a chair. So hopefully I can put those sad memories away and remember the good ones. The caretaker's role in life is a very demanding, sacrificing, difficult one and most of the time we are so tired, we can't think straight. I know this change of life at this late date is going to be difficult, but I do have good memories and great family to rely on. That will get me thru it and hopefully the rest will fade with time. So to you caretakers who are still working so hard, I salute you - we belong to an elite group who are blessed in one way and we hurt so much in others - I intend to keep reading the forum because you have become my friends and beacons in the dark parts of this insidious disease that no one should have to endure. He donated his body to the Univ.WA/VA PD Research group so perhaps down the line somewhere, some good may come from this. My husband didn't win the battle with Parkinsons, but he won the battle of life and lived a very fulfilling and worthwhile life - he was truly a warrior.

By Lacy On 2011.01.11 12:05
My prayers go out to you and your family during this sad time. Your post was so beautifully and eloquently written, bringing so much comfort to those of us who are still fighting the battle along with our loved ones. We can only hope that the time we spend with our spouses is filled with as much love and devotion and support as you have shown to your special guy.

I write this now with tears coming in full force as I think what you must have endured those last 25 years and to think how much we all have ahead of us as well.

God's blessings to you and your family for being who you are and being the people who stood up to this despicable disease and fighting it as you did. May your precious guy rest in peace and know that where he is now is a place that will enable others to learn from him and what he's experienced through living with Parkinsons.

Much love,

By Pearly4 On 2011.01.11 12:40
I'm sorry and offer my good thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

When I lost my mother, I was surprised how soon the bad recent memories faded and how quickly the old good memories came back to take their places. It doesn't diminish the ones we love -- I think its a tribute to their love that we remember them before they were sick rather than after.

By Reflection On 2011.01.11 13:27
I am so sorry for your loss - of the aviator he was, of the beloved you have cared for for so long. All of us owe you thanks for donating your husband's body, helping research that will help all of our loved ones, and for sharing your journey with us.

By karolinakitty On 2011.01.11 14:12
Hubb ... Our thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family...It's one hard battle he fought and with you by his side I'm sure it was that much easier for him. Thank You for donating his body to science. As we all know every thing we do towards finding not just a cure but maybe even a reason why this disease is among us in the first place. Thank you also for sharing your time with us. Your posts have helped so many and we are grateful that you will continue to share in our little family.

By Emma On 2011.01.11 15:31
Hubb, You are always in my thoughts and prayers, and especially now. I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. I hope that as time goes by your memories are of the "old guy" and that you hold those memories close in your heart.

Thank you for the beautiful message to all of us, you have so much grace and wisdom. I am very grateful that you will be staying with us

Many blessings on your new journey.

Your friend, Emma

By caregivermary On 2011.01.11 16:19

I am sincerely sadden to hear of your husband's death. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Thank you for taking your time to recognize the many caregivers on this forum.

Take care

By Mary On 2011.01.11 17:09
hubb, my deepest sympathies to you and your family. Your post gave me the shivers. When my father passed away, I became his daughter again if that makes sense. I miss him so much I can't express it in words. Hugs and blessings, Mary

By parkinit On 2011.01.11 17:11
{ HUGS } to you. I hope you feel our love going out to you and prayers going up for you.

By LOHENGR1N On 2011.01.11 19:34
hubb, My condolences upon your loss. May G-d strengthen you and yours through this time and the times ahead. May the Angels ring round You and Yours protecting and sustaining you. May they light your way in the dark times and guide your feet from stumbling. You've fought the good fight now take time to heal, laugh when you can, cry when you must, again take time to heal my friend. Sincerely Al

By MJ-Camano On 2011.01.12 02:43
Hubb - Sincerely thinking of you and your family at this time. Thank you for your beautiful post, and letting us know of your loss. Please take care of yourself and may you have many wonderful memories to hold you.


By anidaholady On 2011.01.12 09:28
Hubb - I'm so sorry for your loss. I have valued your kindness and insight on this board. It sounds like you have a great support in your family. You have my thoughts and prayers.

By RhondaM On 2011.01.12 10:42
You will be surprised how quickly the good memories take the place of all the bad ones. My dad was also a pilot and a businessman and leader all his life until PD reduced him to a shuffling, falling, demented shell of what he once was, we lost him long before we really lost him, but now when I think of him, I only remember the man that he was before, I never let those bad last years enter my mind, except to be thankful they are over. He passed away in 2003, and I just lost my mom this past year, was a full-time caregiver to her for the last 10 months of her life, and now those good memories of her are starting to replace the sad ones.

Your husband rallied that last time as a final gift from God to you. He did that for us, too, with my dad and my mom.

God bless you in your grieving.


By Lotsapies On 2011.01.12 13:47
Hubb-please know you are in our thoughts, Your post was read aloud by my husband and touched us both. Take care and peace to you and your loved ones. Sally and Bob

By Elenita On 2011.01.23 19:17
My deepest sympathies for you. Our prayers for you and your family. My husband has a very mild case of Parkinson. It was diagnostic last year. He has problems walking, however, he still goes to work and sometimes he travels. Thank you

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