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Topic I Am Thankful for each day I have him. Go to previous topic Go to next topic Go to higher level

By ILoveWil On 2011.07.27 14:03
To all my dear friends here on the Forum, I am thankful for your expert advice to me and your encouragement in my darkest times. This is the 46th day since my Wil had a simple fall in our livingroom, which led to ER, Intensive Care, Rehab Center, back to ER with blood pressure count at 50 and now resting in hospital. I have spent the last 13 days and nights there sleeping in the room with him.

Yesterday the hospital chaplain advised me to go home and sleep in my own bed and get a touch of home again. Boy am I glad I took his advice. I found that I was getting depressed, while outwardly trying to put on a face of hope and encouragement to my husand when he was awake. Sometimes I would escape to the family room there to just let my tears flow for a few seconds...out of his sight.

Today I can be thankful that he is waking up more often and trying to speak to me. It's very hard to understand his words but I'm so glad he is trying. He has retracted his right leg and it's difficult for therapists to get it straightened out but they try daily to do it. His regidity has increased greatly since his fall and hip surgery. But I have noticed that his right hand, which has been tightly clinched shut, has relaxed more. I put a rolled up washcloth in both hands to keep him from clinching them. It seems to work for him. He becomes very agitated and combative with the nurses when they try to turn him over.

But today I still am thankful that he is still with me. Even tho he has a stomach feeding tube, I give him chocolate ice cream by mouth every day or so. The reason I've done this is because this improves his quality of life...he absolutely loves ice cream and smiles at me when I give it to him. I am happy to do anything that would make him happy. I also give him ice water too. I turn on his favorite Smoky Mountain station and let it play all night very softly. He seems to enjoy the soothing music.

They may be releasing him tomorrow to go to a local Rehab Center, if our Insurance will approve it. They will help me by doing a home assessment which will help me prepare my large bedroom for him and get the hospital bed and items I will need. The ultimate goal now for me is to prepare to bring him home. The hospital case manager has told me to wait to envolve Hospice until he arrives at the nursing home. Does anyone know if Hospice allows the stomach feeding tube he has?

I will keep you posted of his move. Am so thankful you are all there and are so helpful with your counsel and advice. I hope I can be as helpful to all of you as you have been to me. Warm hugs to all of you. I have 2 lovely and commited daughters-in-love who will be helping me at home with our Wil.

You never know how much you love your spouse until you've almost lost them or you know their time to leave is very close. I am trying to turn my sadness and feelings of loss into thoughts of thankfulness. I do thank my Heavenly Father for His provision and love over my "dear one". His grace is sufficient for me and His Manna is fresh each morning.

By jules0800 On 2011.07.27 22:54
Dear ilovewil, I had hospice with my mom, I believe it would be worth it to you to meet with them. Take notes, ask them to repeat, and to talk slowly. I would also take the meeting on front of Wil, he deserves to be included. We had a nurse come in 3 times a week who gave support to my dad as well as mom. Mom took the turn for the worst late at night 6 weeks after we started the program', the nurse came and was by her side helping administered morphine so she did not suffer. Soon we had more hospice support . In fact, 6 months after I still get calls making sure I'm doing okay and has been a great support for my father.
Please take care of yourself! You can't be there for Wil if you go down. I'm glad your getting into your own bed tonight. Take a bath, put in music and give yourself a hug. You deserve it. Wil is a lucky man to have been loved as well as you have done.

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