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Topic Feeling Sad Today Go to previous topic Go to next topic Go to higher level

By Grammy7 On 2014.05.26 21:35
Today is my anniversary. I have had 25 wonderful years with my husband. He is in assisted living now and has had Parkinson's for 4 1/2 years. He is confined to bed now. His food is pureed and now he weighs 113 lbs. I brought him a chocolate milkshake. I tried feeding it to him with a spoon. He couldn't make his mouth open and when he did, it was so small I kept spilling all over him. I tried to have him use a straw but he could barely suck the shake up to his mouth. How sad, I left there crying and feeling so sad for him. I keep trying to remember our past memories and not concentrate on the here and now. He was my best friend and I have no one to share special moments with. My 3 daughters sent me beautiful flowers today. It made me cry some more. I will be glad when this day ends....

By jcoff012 On 2014.05.26 23:26
Grammy, you are loved by many. May tomorrow be brighter and a better day for you.

In this world, you honor us all by being together so many years, at a time when it seems everyone you meet is divorced...you are a testament of love. I honor you today. Jane

By umajane On 2014.05.26 23:53
I am so sad for you and your husband...cherish your memories and try to remember the good times.. My love to you on your anniversary.

By Freespirit On 2014.05.27 09:48
Grammy, my heart is with you today on your anniversary. An anniversary is usually a time of celebration, but when our loved one is in this condition, it is truly a difficult time to celebrate.

In my own life, I have tried to make peace with this by remembering all of the wonderful times that my husband and I have had together. I remember how vibrant he once was and all of the things he was capable of doing. It used to be bittersweet to think about this, but then I started asking myself, would I have preferred NOT to have had those times?

I came to a point some time ago where I realized that some people have NEVER had the love, or good times that my husband and I have had even without PD in their lives. . . so even though we have PD to deal with. . . I still feel we have been blessed, and I'll be forever grateful for the "good times" I've had with him.

I'm not saying that anyone else should feel this way. . . I'm just saying that this is what gets me, personally, through the night, folks.

By dans316 On 2014.05.27 10:51
Grammy,

I hope today is at least a little better. Reading your post, I thought of an old song that we used to sing when we had sing a longs.
Silver Threads Among the Gold

The lyrics are as follows:

Darling, I am growing old,
Silver threads among the gold,
Shine upon my brow today,
Life is fading fast away.
But, my darling, you will be,
Always young and fair to me,
Yes, my darling, you will be
Always young and fair to me.
Chorus:
Darling, I am growing old,
Silver threads among the gold,
Shine upon my brow today;
Life is fading fast away.
When your hair is silver white,
And your cheeks no longer bright,
With the roses of the May,
I will kiss your lips and say,
Oh! My darling, mine alone, alone,
You have never older grown!
Yes, my darling, mine alone,
You have never older grown!
chorus
Love can never more grow old,
Locks may lose their brown and gold;
Cheeks may fade and hollow grow,
But the hearts that love will know,
Never, never winterís frost and chill;
Summer warmth is in them still;
Never winterís frost and chill,
Summer warmth is in them still.[5]
chorus

Me Ke Aloha
Dan

By Freespirit On 2014.05.27 11:08
Dear Dan,

I LOVE THAT!!!!!!

YOU MADE MY DAY.

By jsf On 2014.05.27 13:42
I just joined this Forum. This is the first post I've read and I'm already teary eyed. My husband's birthday was yesterday - 73y/o, PD for 10 yrs, some good days, some bad days, living at home. I copied the poem to read again on bad days so I focus on the good one.

By dans316 On 2014.05.27 14:14
The song was copyrighted in 1873. There are several versions on You Tube by different artists, this link is only one of them.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ovyP_ptYzPE

By Mary556 On 2014.05.27 22:24
Prayers for you and your husband, Grammy. Your love for your husband is so strong and is true comfort for him now. You are the love of his life.
Peace be with you both.

By Grammy7 On 2014.05.27 23:45
Thanks to all of you for your comments and song... Today is a little better. I know my husband and I shared a very special love. That does sustain me through the rough times. I look at him laying in his bed and try to remember the vibrant, loving, patient man that he was. No one can take that away. This forum means so much to me. I check it every evening. I know I am not alone in this struggle. I have learned more here than any doctor has ever told me about this disease. All we/I can do is be there and do the best that we can.

By JulieB On 2014.05.28 08:38
Grammy, You are so right in saying that nothing can take away the love and memories you and your husband share. Parkinson's steals a lot, but it can't steal those, and you are blessed to have had them. I have a friend whose marriage hasn't been very nurturing or satisfying, and she has told me, "Julie, at least you and Michael have the foundation of wonderful memories to sustain you" and I know she's right. I also need to more actively remember what we had instead of focus on what is gone. Peace and hope to you, dear Grammy... xoxo

By carman96 On 2014.05.28 23:34
Grammy,
Of course you felt sad on your anniversary. It is a very difficult time in your life. I'm glad you are feeling a little better. It must be very hard to see your husband like that. Your love for him comes shining through in all your words. Sounds like you have some really great memories that you will cherish always.


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