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Topic Hiring a Caregiver Go to previous topic Go to next topic Go to higher level

By sosad25 On 2015.08.23 13:08
After 21 years of Parkinson's it is time to hire live-in help. I want to my husband to remain at home and given his advanced disease I can no longer do it alone. I am offering a young man free rent ( finished basement with separate bed and bath) and a modest monthly salary. Obviously he won't work 24/7 and will have a number of days off during the week as I have a person that comes 2 days a week and Gregg's sister tries to take him out two afternoons a week. That said I need some nights when I can get a peaceful night's sleep so he will have to get up with him etc. He will also have to help with all the ADLs also.
I have obvious concerns about this, i.e. a bad fit, money, liability, etc. Background check is being done and we have skyped and chatted a number of times. He is moving to Denver from the east coast but says he would be moving anyway.
Has anyone had a live in caregiver and formulated a written agreement and if so if you could give me hints on what I need to surely include I would appreciate it?
Thanks so much. This forum is my life line:)

By lurkingforacure On 2015.08.23 23:25
What a difficult place to be on so many levels. I'm going to throw out the concerns I would have if I were in your shoes...here goes....

-get the lease clearly worded and written and signed by both parties....he is living in space you own so yes, you and he will be landlord and tenant as well as employee/employer. Be very clear about what is allowed in your home and what isn't, how long the lease will last, whether his staying there is tied to satisfactory performance as a helper (in other words, if he doesn't work out as a helper, you need to be able to get him out of your home so you can offer that space to someone else who can be the helper you need-I would get an attorney to help me with this)

-a clearly worded agreement on what his duties and responsibilities are and grounds for termination (I don't know what your state requirements are, some states require cause for termination and other states are at-will (no cause required))

-identity theft (so make sure all of your sensitive documents are locked up since the helper will be in your home while you are asleep or not there ....the computer, files/filing cabinet, bank statements, tax returns, papers listing social security numbers, account numbers, birthdates, etc.)

-does he know about PD? He needs to, and specifically how it affects your husband.

-I hate to say this, but I would honestly have hidden cameras throughout the house, at least for the first few weeks. One, to make sure he isn't doing anything he shouldn't while in your house and also to ensure that he is properly taking care of your husband and two, to provide an account if anything should happen, heaven forbid. Trust, but verify, as they say.

-I think I would also contact an elder care attorney and ask for their input. It could be well worth the money spent, as they would be familiar with the issues that arise in these situations and how best to deal with them as well as prevent potential problems.

I am so glad you are getting some help, and that you are sharing that with us here. Remember that no one can caregive in perpetuity without a break:)

By VioletV On 2015.08.23 23:43
I googled and found this information that may be helpful to you: https://www.caring.com/questions/how-much-to-pay-live-in-caregiver

Good luck. And, please share your experience as you can. This same decision may be in my immediate future as my husband's cognition seems to be slipping.

VV


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