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Topic How do you help a PWP handle stress?I Go to previous topic Go to next topic Go to higher level

By jcoff012 On 2016.08.16 18:43
I realize we have discussed the stress that a PWP has to handle in his daily life, but how can *we* help him to handle stress from outside forces...such as his worrying about me?!

I see Carl's face and attitude when he tries to cope with my eye problems, and the more I have to face, the worse his tremors become. You see, I am still getting monthly injections and now was cleared to have cataract surgery on my left eye at the end of September. Normal cataract surgery is simple and quick, but I have an extra problem, a film, which can make recovery more difficult. This was a new kink in what should have been a relatively simple I would be the one in three thousand to have this! Lol

As you can see, I take things one step at a time, but Carl's reaction and added tremors are worrying me. How do you handle things when YOU are the reason for the stress? Is there anything I can do to ease his worry? Does PD make him process all of this differently than pre-PD when he was a rock?

This is not imagined. When we came out of the surgeon's office, he was visibly shaking and quiet. Then, the next day, at the retinologist, he didn't go in ...he always does. I didn't push it.

I hope someone here has actually had to go through this...he will be in the waiting room, by himself, for two hours...I told the doctor I will be more worried about him than me! But, more importantly, I need to know how to help him through this. Any ideas?

By mylove On 2016.08.18 22:08
I wish I had answers, Jane. We are going through a little bit of that, too. The cat disappeared this week, and every day I come home to him wiped out from 5-6 trips through the bush looking for her. I don't know who to worry about more.

I think PD makes things less emotionally resilient.

By EachDay On 2016.08.18 22:38
Dear Jane, No, I don't think it is imagined. My husband responds to all my moods and any emotion I might show. When I'm positive, that is great but if I feel less than that, he responds.

You may not want to hear this, but my only way to deal with shielding him from what will agitate him and create tremors and dyskinesia is to try not to include him in my issues. It is not how I wish we could be in our marriage but I've felt I've had no choice. If I have a medical issue, I go on my own or get someone else to be there with me to drive me home. I don't really ever talk about my issues with him.

By flowers12 On 2016.08.18 22:58
This is just so hard. I have to be very careful, and it's so darn hard, not to show any emotions other than positive or my hubby goes into an episode. Sometimes I just can't hold back and I always blame myself for his reaction. I've had a few medical issues that were not that serious and he just wasn't concerned. I do have a medical issue that needs surgery, sometime in the future, that I will not discuss with him for fear of how he will react. It's hard bearing the worry on my own but it's harder to have to see him react.

We always went together to the dentist and eye doctors, one after the other, but now I worry about him sitting in the waiting room while I'm being taken care of. So many changes to what was.

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