Helping Those Who Care for Parkinson's Patients
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Hi, I have never posted before, but I have read a lot of posts during the past year and you are all very helpful and there is such great info and support here. I wanted to share my story in the hopes that I might get some support during my Dad's last days. My 85 yr old Dad has had PD for a long time and it finally got to the point last summer that he could not be taken care of by his wife-my stepmom any longer. We had him in an assisted living facility for Alzheimers and Dimentia patients for several Months and at that point he could still walk with a walker on good days and could talk and feed himself at the table, but had halucinations and dimentia and "sundowners" where he would be up all night. Anyway, because of several different reasons, In November we had my Dad moved to a great Board and Care home where he is getting very good care. His condition has been rapidly declining however and he has been in the hospital twice with pneumonia before christmas and after new years and each time it has taken its toll on him. As of last week, he was unable to talk (he tries but we just can't understand him) he can no longer stand up on his own and he has this weird thing with his eyes- he keeps them closed all the time and only opens them when we ask him to. We started Hospice and they are helping the board and care when needed. He was only eating pureed food and no thin liquids- everything has thickener which he hates. In addition to his swallowing issues, he has congestive heart failure and his BP is constantly fluctuating and can get real low and his pulse will sometimes race. As of the last few days he is bedridden and is in a pretty much vegetative state- he just grabs and pulls at things every once in a while and keeps his eyes closed for the most part. As his eating has almost stopped and it is hard for them to give him his medications, the hospice nurse is talking about giving him morphine to ease his suffering. I know this is the the last stage before he passes. My question to the group is- how long can this last? Can he stay in this state for weeks or months? Can he still have yet another rebound from this stage as well? It feels terrible to hope for my dads quick passing, but seeing him this way is just so hard. Any experiences anyone can share about coping with their loved ones at this stage would be appreciated. Thanks, Don |
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Welcome to our forum. I hope that we can help you through this most difficult period. Only God can tell how long a person is going to hang on but we also have some fairly good signs to tell us what is most likely to happen. In your cae the Hospice people are your best resource and I would encourage you to listen to them. As many people on the forum know, my husband died a year ago under circumstances much like your father is going through now. He was in the vegatative, non verbal phase for two weeks and Hospice also started him on morephine. Being a nurse I wanted to see if he could go without the morephine but it quickly became apparent that he couldn't. I believe it made things very peaceful for him at the end. My husband had no heart problems so it took some time. He was 78 years old and had been diagnosed with PD for 17 yrs. Being an oncology nurse I have seen several people die and it is not unusual for them to start distancing themselves for some days before they die. It is almost as if they are somewhere else part of the time. Our Hospice nurse told us to observe my husband's legs and when they started to feel cold and look grey it would gradually work up the leg - that is what did happen. Also, onserve the urinary output. Death usually occurs within 24 hrs of no urine output. Having said all of that - people can rally from the worst of situations as he has done in the past. Each crisis weakens him a little more but one just never truly knows. I wish you strength during this time. We are here for you. |